TNA iMPACT!
Orlando, Florida (Impact Zone)
May 3, 2010
Commentators: Mike Tenay & Taz
Report by: Josh Boutwell of Wrestleview.com
We are live from O-Town! Tonight’s show kicks off with highlights from last week and then we cut a shot of Hogan and Bischoff riding in a limo somewhere. Bischoff says that ‘his’ plane is about to touch down and Hogan says all the big fish are coming to the pond. Hogan talks about how Flair is going to react when he sees what Hogan is going to do with Flair’s Hall of Fame ring. Bischoff says something has to be done about Sting and Hogan is going to call him out tonight.
We then cut to the usual Impact opening.
Live from inside the Impact Zone tonight’s show is officially underway with Tenay & Taz hyping up the show for tonight. Tenay says he has huge news right off the bat. Earlier today Dixie Carter made the following announcement to the roster: Impact is OFFICIALLY moving back to Thursday nights starting May 13th! Tenay says that SpikeTV has picked up TNA: Reaction which will be airing on Thursdays as well.
We then cut to the announcement that Sting and Hogan will be having a “summit” tonight and Taz says that Sting told him personally that he would be breaking his silence tonight!
Ric Flair’s music hits but instead of Flair walking out it’s Jay Lethal! Lethal is wearing a suit and Ric Flair’s Hall of Fame ring on his finger! Oh lord, Lethal is doing a complete Ric Flair impersonation. Lethal is doing the Four Horsemen hand gestures as Taz and Tenay finally realizes what Lethal is wearing on his finger. Lethal even does the “Woooo” chant. Lethal’s impersonation is actually pretty good. Lethal says that Hogan told him they would be ‘doing it’ at the end of the show but he cannot wait for then. Just keep in mind that Lethal is doing a Ric Flair impersonation the entire time and I just can’t put into words how he is emphasizing his Flair-isms. Lethal says he couldn’t wait because he is the 16-time World Champion and then points out a lady in the front row and says he won’t take her home no matter what she says. He then screams at fan to shutup. Lethal does the “To be the man” thing and takes his jacket off and Knee Drops it. Lethal continues to do the impersonation until Flair’s music hits again!
The real Ric Flair comes out to a big ovation and he doesn’t look amused whatsoever. Flair asks Lethal if he knows where he is right now. Flair says in the world that Lethal wants to be someone in he is standing in front of God right now. Lethal tries to say he’s not trying to disrespect him, but Flair says yes he is and noone in this business walks out to this ring and does that. Flair tells Lethal he’s going to do one that Lethal hasn’t seen yet and drops his shades on the mat and stomps on them. Flair then takes his jacket off and asks Lethal if he really wants to be Ric Flair. Lethal asks Flair to calm down and if this about the ring he can take it. Lethal takes the ring off and hands it back to Flair. Lethal says from the bottom of his heart he meant no disrespect to Flair he just always wanted to be the Nature Boy even if it was for only 2 minutes. Lethal says Flair is the man. Lethal says he’ll get a picture of them and frame it because this is the greatest moment of his life. Lethal says in Elizabeth, New Jersey there is a beautiful woman watching TV with a tear in her eye because she knows her little boy has made it because he’s standing in the ring with the legend, Ric Flair. Flair thanks Lethal for giving him back his ring but that doesn’t dig him out of the whole he’s in! Flair slaps Lethal across the face! Flair takes his shirt off and slaps Lethal again! Flair says in Lethal’s world Flair is God! He says he IS wrestling! Flair tells Lethal to tell his mother that the greatest moment in his life has just become the saddest moment of his life and slaps him again! Lethal answers and slaps the taste out of Flair’s mouth!
Flair charges at Lethal and starts to chop him but Lethal turns it around and Flair Chops the hell out of Flair’s bare chest! Lethal whips Flair into the corner and hit’s a Backdrop! Lethal grabs Flair and puts him in the Figure Four! AJ Styles, Beer Money, & Desmond Wolfe hit the ring and jump Lethal! Beer Money start whipping Lethal with belts and hold Lethal so Flair can beat on him. Flair kicks Lethal in the nuts but then Abyss runs out! Abyss starts laying everyone out until the numbers game gets the best of him and the heels start to put the beat down on the Monster. Team 3D is now out and they even things up! Things are going crazy as these guys are beating the hell out of each other! The heels get the advantage again but then RVD’s music hits and the Champ makes his way out to the ring with a chair! The heels bail out and RVD is standing tall with the rest of the baby faces now.
We cut to a shot of Bischoff and Hogan driving somewhere again when Hogan gets a text message telling him what just went down. Hogan tells the driver to turn around and go back to the arena.
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Back from commercials RVD and the baby faces are still in the ring with the heels looking on from the ramp. Replays are shown of what just went down before the break with the big brawl. In the ring RVD has a microphone and says he has an idea. Instead of everybody beating up on “Macho Dude” the four “horses a**es” come down for a fair fight. A huge “fight” chant erupts as Flair grabs a microphone. Flair says if they want it they got it! Flair leads the heels to the ring! The brawl is back on! Lethal takes Flair out with a huge shot as Devon and Storm brawl out to the floor same with Bubba and Roode! Finally it gets down to just RVD and AJ in the ring! Bubba starts to DDT Flair on the ramp but Roode stops him with a huge right hand. AJ is on the floor now nailing Abyss with right hands. Storm grabs Bubba and throws him into the announce table while Flair low blows Lethal again. Abyss throws AJ into the guardrail and things are out of control! Hulk Hogan’s music hits!
Hogan walks out and decks Roode as Roode came at him! Wolfe charges at Hogan but etas a right as well! Hogan comes into the ring and decks Storm and then decks AJ! Its now down to just Hogan and Flair! Flair goes for a right but Hogan blocks it and nails Flair with one of his own and then throws Flair over the top rope!
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Back from commercials the brawl is back on as security and referees are trying to break things up. Flair and RVD are going at it. Finally things are pulled apart with the baby faces back in the ring and the heels on the ramp. Hogan says since they just beat up the man he can quote the man! Hogan says TNA is the best thing going in wrestling and says he’s not mad about all this because the TNA fans want action and that’s exactly what we have here. Hogan says he doesn’t like Desmond Wolfe but since he was one of the ring leaders out there it’s going to be RVD vs. Desmond Wolfe for the title tonight! Wolfe was leading in the TNA Rankings Poll the last time I checked by the way. Hogan says he’s going to put the ex-champ AJ Styles against Abyss in a Monsters Ball tonight as well! That’s not it! He says he’s adding Team 3D to Beer Money’s match against the Machine Guns tonight making it a 3-Way! Storm spits at 3D as guys are talking trash now. Wolfe points at RVD and says he’s coming for the belt.
We cut to the rafters where Sting is looking on pacing back and forth.
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Back from the commercials the Beautiful People are getting ready. Lacey starts complaining about her back hurting because the belt hurts her while she’s sleeping. Velvet asks her if she’s really been wearing it to bed and Lacey answers by saying she though they weren’t supposed to take them off. Madison and Velvet just ignore that statement and starts complaining about all of their titles being on the line tonight in a 6-Man. Madison says tonight the belts are staying right where they are and Lacey says “see I told you we’re not supposed to take them off!”
In the ring Douglas Williams (still wearing the X-Division Title) is with Brian Kendrick. Williams says due to travel conditions totally out of his control he’s been stripped of the X-Division Title. Williams says volcanoes erupting with half the world on a shutdown and he’s the one that’s punished and he says it’s not right. Williams says not only that but now that he’s back he has to be in a tag team with the crazed lunatic in the ring with him, Kendrick. Kendrick didn’t like that little comment but Williams tells him to calm down. Williams says while Kazarian has been sitting at home Kaz has been ‘prancing’ around calling himself the X-Division Champion, but he’s not the real champ and if he wants to be the real champ he has to beat Williams for HIS title at Sacrifice. Williams says if he doesn’t then he’ll be nothing more than a cheap imitation.
X-Division Tag Team Match
Ink Inc. (Shannon Moore & Jesse Neal) vs. Douglas Williams & Brian Kendrick
Moore & Neal already have a team name, Ink Inc. and I’m not sure how I feel about that name. Moore is wearing his new TNA t-shirt and we see a replay of what led to Neal and Moore coming together last week. Neal and Williams will kick the match off. They lockup and Williams immediately gets the advantage by getting Neal in a Full Nelson. Williams transitions into a Snapmare Takeover and then locks Neal in a headlock, but Neal counters into a wristlock. Williams reverses it and then hit’s a Single Leg Takeover. Williams lifts Neal up and goes for a German Suplex but Neal blocks it with back elbows. Williams shoves Neal into the corner and then charges at him, but Neal hits another back elbow. Neal then hit’s a Springboard Cross Body Block out of the corner on Williams! 1…2…NO Williams kicks out! Matt Morgan has joined the commentator booth. Kendrick distracts Neal which allows Williams to grab Neal and hit a Modified Northern Lights Suplex! Kendrick tags in and puts the boots to Neal immediately. Kendrick mounts the back of Neal and starts hitting Crossface shots and then locks him in a Camel Clutch. Williams tags back in and puts the boots to Neal as Kendrick holds on to him and Tenay announces that at Sacrifice Morgan has to put the belts on the line against Moore & Neal and Hulk Hogan will be picking Morgan’s partner for the match! Williams hit’s a Knee Drop on Neal followed by 2 more! 1…2…NO Neal kicks out! Williams nails Neal with a European Uppercut and then whips him into the corner. Williams charges and Neal gets his boot up but Williams blocks his foot and then swings it into the ropes and low blows Neal behind the referees back! Williams charges at Neal with a Running Knee but Neal is able to roll out of the way! Williams tags Kendrick in as Neal crawls towards Moore. Kendrick grabs Neal by the boot and tries to drag him back but Neal kicks him off and tags in Moore! Kendrick charges at Moore before he even gets in the ring but Moore nails Kendrick with a right hand and then climbs to the top! Moore hit’s a gorgeous Flying Cross Body on Kendrick and then knocks Williams off the apron! Moore hit’s a Dropkick on Kendrick and then whips Kendrick into the ropes and hits an Atomic Drop! Moore follows up with a Back Heel Kick on Kendrick for a near fall! Moore whips Kendrick into the ropes and charges but Kendrick avoids him and rolls Moore up! 1…2…NO Moore kicks out! Kendrick charges at Moore in the corner again but Moore hits him with a back elbow and then climbs to the middle rope! Moore hit’s the Mooregasm off the middle rope and then tags Neal back in! Neal hit’s a huge Spear on Kendrick! 1…2…3 and Ink Inc. picks up the victory!
Winners: Ink Inc. via pinfall (Spear)
On commentary Morgan said he was giving Hulk Hogan 7 days to tell him who his partner would be at Sacrifice or he’ll destroy the TNA roster.
After the match Kendrick wants to know where the hell Douglas was at the end of the match but Williams slaps him! Kendrick chases Williams up the ramp when Samoa Joe’s music hits! Joe lays Williams out with a clothesline and Kendrick laughs and pats Joe on the chest and starts talking trash to Williams. Joe nails Kendrick with a Superkick as he turns around and then tosses him back into the ring! Joe hit’s a Running Knee Strike to Kendrick in the corner followed by the Muscle Buster! Joe stares into the camera and then looks around as Tenay says we still don’t know who abducting him. Joe grabs a microphone and starts to say something but then just throws the microphone down and walks away!
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Back from commercials JB is in Flair and companies locker-room but Flair says they’re not in the mood and kicks JB out. He leaves the door cracked though and the cameraman peeks inside. Flair screams at his men to stop laughing and start talking about what just happened. He asks them what they’re going to do about what just happened. AJ says he doesn’t appreciate being put in a Hardcore Match but Flair says he’s AJ Styles and the face of TNA so he needs to go out there and kick that “elephants” a**. He says AJ is a race horse so act like it. Flair says he told the whole world that Beer Money was the muscle but now that don’t have anything, no titles or nothing. Flair says he needs the respect and the power so he needs them to be what he thought they would be. Storm says they are the best but Flair grabs his beer and throws it against the wall and says how can you be the best drinking beer before a match. He tells them to prove they’re the best and Roode says they will. Flair turns to Wolfe and tells him that RVD will tear him up if he doesn’t get right in his mind right now. Flair says he hopes Wolfe is giving to Chelsea more than he’s giving to Flair right now because if he isn’t then she’ll be long gone! He tells Wolfe to go out there and make it happen tonight and bring back the title. Flair tells everybody to make it happen or he’ll find replacements. He turns around and sees the cameraman and slams the door on him.
We cut to a shot of Hulk Hogan talking to someone off camera. Hogan says the last 2 years of his life has been hell but he thought the business part of all of this would be easier because he knows this business and loves it. Hogan says he walked into TNA and was swamped with problems especially with Sting turning on TNA. He asks this person what makes Sting tick and wants to know how Sting could do what he did. Hogan says he’s getting in Sting’s face tonight.
Tenay and Taz discuss what’s been going down with Sting as of late from the announce table.
There is something going on backstage and we cut to someone in what looks like a Catholic robe or something and beating on The Pope! We see it’s Mr. Anderson as he low blows Pope! Anderson then grabs a big equipment case and rolls it into Pope repeatedly while asking where’s the ‘tough guy.’ Anderson stands over Pope and sarcastically says “look what I’ve done” and then turns around and puts Pope’s shades on.
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Back from commercials Mr. Anderson’s music hits and he comes out still wearing that robe. Anderson brings the mic down from the ceiling but instead of doing his usual intro he starts talking like a crazy over-the-top preacher (mocking Pope). Anderson tells the people not to judge him because of his beautiful attire and then says he stands in front of his congregation at a loss for words as a big “you suck” chant starts. Anderson says “forgive them father for they know not what they speak”. He says he had a tremendous sermon prepared for this evening but on his way to the ring he had an epiphany and that epiphany was….he stops as the fans are chanting at him again and chanting “we want Pope” as well. Anderson says Pope won’t be joining us today and then he says he realized as he came to the ring that he won’t be going to heaven, but will in fact burn in hell. Jeff Hardy’s music hits!
Jeff makes his way out to the ring as Anderson looks on surprised at Jeff coming out. Jeff says his creatures of the night and the ‘congregation’ are one in the same. Jeff freaks me out. Jeff says because of Anderson Jeff’s good friend The Pope won’t be cleared for Sacrifice (he just had surgery). Anderson mockingly says he feels so horrible about that. Jeff calls Anderson a clown and then says he needs a match at Sacrifice and challenges Anderson! Anderson asks Hardy if he’s really challenging him and Jeff says yep. Anderson asks Jeff if he doubts that Anderson would accept but Anderson then says “naw” because he has something going on that night. The fans chant for Anderson to “take the dress off.” Anderson says he’s grown tired of Jeff and all the sinners out there tonight. He starts to walk away but then turns around and swings the microphone at Jeff, but Jeff ducks and hit’s the Twist of Fate! Jeff then strips the robe off of Anderson and the dude is wearing bikini briefs. They say “Talk Into” on the back, oh my lord. Jeff says “those panties are SWEET!” and Jeff has for the first time in his life made me laugh! Jeff rolls Anderson over and asks Anderson again if he’ll wrestle him at Sacrifice! Jeff then impersonates Anderson’s voice accepting the challenge and then tells Anderson “welcome to hell!” As Jeff was walking up the ramp Anderson comes to and realizes that he’s pretty much naked.
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TNA Knockout & TNA Knockouts Tag Team Championships
6-Knockout Tag Team Match
Tara, Sarita, & Taylor Wilde vs. The Beautiful People (c)
Tara, Sarita, & Taylor Wilde are all former champions. Taylor is a former Knockout Champion as is Tara and Taylor & Sarita were the first Knockouts Tag Team Champions. Tenay explains the stipulations of this match: if Madison is pinned then whomever pins her becomes the Knockout Champion and if either Lacey or Velvet are pinned then the person that pins her wins the Tag Titles (and I would assume gets to pick her partner). Tara shoves Sarita and Taylor and tells them to get out of the ring and then tells them to ‘watch and learn.’ Lacey shakes her tale at Tara (yes that was hot) and Tara kicks her and then hit’s a Snap Suplex and then floats over into a Guillotine Choke! Tara spits at her tag partners now as she stands Lacey up and whips her into the ropes! Tara goes for a clothesline but Lacey ducks and then hit’s a Spinning Back Kick but comes nowhere near Tara’s head and in fact makes contact pretty hard with Tara’s midsection. Tara tags in Sarita and Lacey charges at Sarita with a clothesline attempt, but Sarita ducks and hit’s a German Suplex. Lacey rolls backwards and tags in Velvet. Sarita turns around and looks at Tara as Tara was screaming at her which allowed Velvet to come in and attack Sarita from behind. Velvet whips Sarita into the corner and charges at her but Sarita gets her boots up and then grabs Velvet by the feet and rolls her backwards onto her feet! Sarita then shoves Velvet into the corner and hit’s a One-legged Flapjack! 1..2…NO Velvet kicks out! Taylor tags in and Sarita flips Taylor backwards into a Moonault on Velvet! 1…2…NO Velvet kicks out! Taylor puts Velvet in a Front Chancery but Tara starts screaming at her to tag her which allows Velvet to come back on Taylor and slam her to the mat. Velvet tags in Madison now and she goes for a clothesline, but Taylor ducks and hit’s a German Suplex! Taylor tries to tag out to Sarita but Tara intercepted the tag! Tara then turns towards BP but Sarita blind tags her on the back and Tara turns around and punches Sarita off the apron! Taylor comes in and shoves Tara all while BP is watching. Taylor turns around to check on her partner so Tara shoves her out of the ring down to the floor! Tara rolls out and starts beating on Taylor as Sarita crawls back in the ring. Velvet & Lacey run over and grab Sarita and hit a nasty Double DDT! Madison covers her, 1…2…3!
Winners & STILL Champs: Beautiful People
I’m kind of worried for Sarita right now because I think she might have taken that DDT kind of stiff and landed on her head. The referee checks on her but she’s moving around now as Taylor checks on her so hopefully she’s okay.
——————–COMMERCIAL BREAK————————–
Back from commercials Christy Hemme is with Tara in the back. Tara says she has busted her butt in TNA but she gets no respect from the wrestlers or the management. She says the only way she gets respect is with the championship around her waist. Tara challenges Madison to a match at Sacrifice for the belt. Christy says Tara hasn’t won many matches lately and asks her how she’s going to get TNA management to grant this title shot. Tara thanks Christy for reminding her and then she says she’s willing to put her career on the line in the match!
Three Way Dance
Beer Money Inc vs. Team 3D vs. Motor City Machine Guns
Roode and Sabin start the match off and Roode kicks Sabin as the bell rings and then lights him up with chops. Roode whips Sabin into the corner but Sabin floats up and over a charging Roode and then cartwheels over Roode as he runs the ropes! Sabin then springboards into a backflip over Roode as he charged him again. Sabin ducks a clothesline and hit’s a back heel kick! 1…2…NO Roode kicks out! Roode comes back with a Knee Strike and an elbow and then he tags in Storm. Storm locks Sabin in a Side Headlock but Sabin shoves him off into the ropes (Shelley blind tagged Sabin as this was going on). Storm walks into an Atomic Drop from Shelley and then a Sliding Dropkick to the knees from Sabin! Shelley rolls over the back of Storm and bridges up while holding Storm’s head in place for Sabin to connect with a Sliding Dropkick to the face! Shelley gets a near fall on Storm and then goes for a Suplex but Storm blocks it. Shelley then switches to a Waistlock but Storm reverses it. Shelley grabs the ropes and shoves Storm off but Devon tags Shelley. Devon nails Storm with a clothesline and gets a near fall. Devon lays into Storm with right hands in the corner and then he throws Storm into Bubba’s foot as Bubba had it propped up on the top rope. Devon attempts to whip Storm into the ropes but Storm reverses it and then fakes a knee injury to get the referees attention so that Roode can hit Devon from the outside. Storm then hits Codebreaker and tags in Roode! Roode puts the boots to Devon and then knocks the Guns off the apron. Roode throws Devon into the corner and tags Storm back in. Beer Money hit the Beer Money Double Suplex on Devon. 1…2…NO Sabin breaks it up! Roode tags back in and Beer Money whips Devon into the corner. Roode whips Storm at Devon but Devon moves out of the way and then clotheslines Roode! The fans get behind Brother Devon as he’s able to roll over and tags in Bubba! Bubba with clotheslines on Beer Money as well as a Big Boot for Storm! Bubba whips Roode into the ropes and hit’s a backdrop followed by jabs on Storm and then the Bionic Elbow! Bubba hit’s a Scoop Slam on Roode and Devon climbs to the top and hit’s the Whatsup Diving Headbutt to the nuts! The Outsiders sneak down and jump 3D and the referee throws it out.
Winners: NO CONTEST
The Outsiders beat on 3D until Eric Young runs out with a kendo stick and he nails 3D with it! What the hell? Young smiles and then poses with Nash & Hall! The Guns come in and attack Young! Shelley tosses Young out to the floor and then the Guns hit the Flatliner/Missile Dropkick combo on Hall! Nash nails Shelley with a knee to the gut and then goes for the Jackknife but Sabin leaps off the back of his partner and Enziguri’s Nash in the head! The Guns then hit a nasty Double Superkick on Nash! Beer Money comes in and Roode hit’s a Spinebuster on Sabin and then they hit the DWI on Shelley! Eric Young is back up and he stomps on Shelley and Devon. The Outsiders start to come to and they pose over 3D and pose with Young. Hall shakes hands with Beer Money.
——————–COMMERCIAL BREAK————————–
Back from commercials I guess it’s time for Orlando Jordan’s “O-Zone” segment. He’s wearing some weird silver tights tonight as he sits on a 70’s looking couch. Orlando welcomes us to the O-Zone where he says anything can and will happen. Orlando says he does what he wants to, says what he wants to, and acts how he wants to. Jordan says “one size fits all and batteries not needed” and then looks down at his crotch. I think I just vomited in my mouth a little right there. Jordan says “don’t worry it would be our little secret.” Jordan says he knows everybody thinks he has a little freak in him but his guest tonight is THE Freak, Rob Terry. Jordan raises a curtain a curtain and a cutout of Terry is standing there. Jordan thanks Terry for being there and he says he thought he had the perfect body but he says Terry’s abs are amazing. Taz hilariously asks Tenay how long this is going to go. Jordan says what he wants to know is what kind of fantasies does a Freak have. He asks the cutout who he fantasizes about and then says he’s honored because Terry fantasizes about him. Terry’s music hits and he knocks Jordan on his ass! Terry then tears up the cutout and grabs the microphone. Terry tells Jordan not to make him comeback. Terry turns around and poses with the Global Title for the fans and Jordan pulls the chain off from around his waist and nails Terry from behind with it! Jordan puts the boots to Terry and then chokes him with that chain! Jordan screams at Terry as he chokes Terry out. Jordan puts the boots to Terry some more and then picks up a vase and slams it into Terry!
Monsters Ball Match
“The Phenomenal” AJ Styles vs. “The Monster” Abyss
Rules to this match are there is No DQ, No Countout, Falls Count Anywhere. Tenay points out that noone has been in more Monsters Ball Matches than Abyss (I think he’s been in almost all of them). Abyss tosses weapons in to the ring but as he starts to get in the ring AJ nails him with a right hand and then goes for the Springboard Flying Forearm but Abyss catches him in midair! Abyss goes for a Chokeslam but AJ nails him with a back elbow and then throws a trashcan at him! AJ charges at Abyss but Abyss hits him with an Overhead Belly-to-Belly Suplex over the top rope into the ring! Tenay runs down AJ and Abyss’s history together in TNA. Abyss sets up a chair in the corner but he turns around and AJ swings another one at him. Abyss ducks it and then hit’s a Big Boot on AJ. Abyss grabs a crutch now but AJ kicks it out of his hand. Abyss then swings a chair at AJ but AJ avoids it and then stomps on the chair to get it out of Abyss’s hands. Abyss then decks AJ with a big right hand. Abyss picks the chair up and swings it again but again AJ ducks! AJ then hit’s the Pele out of nowhere kicking the chair back into Abyss’s face! AJ this a dropkick on Abyss sending him into the corner and then AJ puts the boots to Abyss in the corner and hit’s a series of big knees and right hands. A big “AJ sucks” chant starts as AJ nails Abyss with right hands. AJ comes off the ropes but Abyss comes back with a Press Slam! Abyss then charges at AJ in the corner but AJ moves and chops away at Abyss. AJ attempts to whip Abyss into the opposite corner but Abyss reverses it. AJ attempts to float up and over Abyss but Abyss stopped in his tracks and then grabs AJ by the back of the neck and throws him into that chair that Abyss set up earlier in the corner! Abyss hit’s the Shock Treatment on AJ! 1…2…NO AJ kicks out! Abyss goes out to the floor and gets his back of tacks out from under the ring! Abyss lays the tacks out in the ring as the fans go nuts. Ric Flair and Chelsea walk out with Chelsea wearing a trench coat. He screams at her to take her coat off and Abyss grabs her to ‘save’ her from Flair. AJ picks up a chair and starts to swing it at Abyss so Flair pulls Chelsea away right as AJ nails Abyss with it! AJ nails Abyss with it again as Chelsea smiles now. AJ charges at Abyss but Abyss backdrops AJ over the top rope. AJ lands on the ramp and Flair slides the brass knuckles to AJ. As Abyss reaches out to pull AJ back in AJ nut shots Abyss with the brass knucks! AJ then hit’s a Springboard Cross Body onto Abyss right into the tacks! 1…2…3 and AJ gets the win!
Winner: Styles via pinfall (Springboard Cross Body into thumbtacks)
After the match Chelsea gets into the ring with Flair and shows Abyss that she had on a regular dress under her coat (showing it was a setup obviously) while Flair and AJ continue to beat on him.
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TNA World Heavyweight Championship
“Whole F’N Show” Rob Van Dam (c) vs. Desmond Wolfe w/Chelsea
Wolfe jumps RVD as he starts to enter the ring and knocks him out to the floor. Wolfe throws RVD into the ring post and then rolls him back into the ring. Wolfe throws RVD into the corner and puts the boots to him and then he hit’s a Running European Uppercut on RVD. Wolfe goes for a Suplex but RVD blocks it so Wolfe attempts to whip him into the corner instead. RVD reverses it and then goes for a Rolling Monkey Flip but Wolfe sidesteps him and then grabs him by the hair. Wolfe kicks RVD in the back and then clotheslines him to the mat! 1…2…NO RVD kicks out! RVD comes back with right hands on Wolfe and then he attempts to whip Wolfe into the ropes but Wolfe blocks it and counters into the Hammerlock DDT! 1…2…NO RVD kicks out! Wolfe shoves RVD into the corner and then goes for the Running European Uppercut from the opposite corner again but when he turned around RVD had gone to another corner quickly and climbed to the top! RVD hit’s a Flying Sidekick on Wolfe! RVD hits Rolling Thunder! RVD springs to the top but Wolfe crotches him. Wolfe then goes for the Tower of London but RVD blocked it so Wolfe hit’s a big Forearm Smash. Wolfe taunts RVD and then goes for the Tower of London onto the ramp but RVD blocks it and then shoves Wolfe to the ramp. RVD then hit’s a Springboard Flying Backkick on Wolfe on the ramp! Wolfe charges back at RVD but RVD backdrops him over the top rope to the mat and then climbs up to top and hit’s the 5-Star Frog Splash! 1…2…3 and RVD retains!
Winner & STILL World Champ: RVD via pinfall (5-Star Frog Splash)
After the match RVD comes out of nowhere with Flying Forearm off the top! AJ screams at RVD that he’s evoking his rematch clause at Sacrifice! AJ poses over RVD with the belt.
We cut to the back where Hogan walks up on Jarrett laying on the ground. Jarrett tells RVD that Sting just “knocked the hell” out of him.
Back from commercials it’s time for Hogan’s confrontation with Sting as Hogan walks down to the ring. Hogan grabs the mic and says one of his favorite wrestlers always talks about “getting real” (Angle) and when he signed up with TNA he knew what he was getting into. He says when he started to talk about change in TNA when he first came in he had know idea that it would be Sting that changed the most. He says it’s time to find out what’s real and he calls Sting out. Sting doesn’t make Hulkster wait long as his music hits immediately!
Sting walks out to the ring bat-in-hand. Hogan says Sting can fool some of the people some of the time but Sting can’t fool him any of the time. Hogan says he knows who Sting is and what he’s all about so he needs to let Hogan in on this new change in Sting. Sting smiles and then grabs a microphone and he says he can’t wait to tell him what makes Sting tick! Sting says what makes him tick is TNA! Sting says his agenda is the same today as it was 5 years ago when he first came to TNA and that is to give back to the sport of wrestling that he loves so much especially TNA because he loves this brand. Sting says when he thinks about all of those years when Hogan was up in WWF he had this veil of protection over him this whole time and when he came to WCW he saw first time Hogan had that same veil of protection over him, but here in TNA Hogan has no protection. Hogan says this isn’t about TNA and Sting it’s about Hogan and Sting and the fact that maybe Hogan will protect some of the guys in TNA. He says it’s about Sting not being able to pick people off at he wants or he can’t take cheap shots at guys like Hogan and Abyss without someone having their backs. Hogan mentions Sting putting his hands on Dixie Carter and then says that Sting just laid Jarrett out backstage and asks if that’s what really makes Sting tick. Sting starts laughing in Hogan’s face and he says that Sting always said Hogan was one of the best Chess players of all time and if Hogan wants to play Chess than it’s his move! Sting puts the bat right up to Hogan’s throat and then tells Sting to try his best shot. Hogan and tells Sting to go ahead and try to put an end to him right now and Sting starts to get angrier as Jeff Jarrett walks down!
Sting turns around and Jarrett lays Sting out with a bat! Jarrett starts to hit Sting with the bat again but Hogan stops him and tells him to chill out as we fade to black.
Final Thoughts
First I’m going to rundown the show and then I’m going to rant at the end.
Well tonight was extremely disappointing after the strong Impact’s we’ve had of late. It started off hot but then it was just fool of bad segments and short matches.
The show started off with a really strong segment. Lethal was hilarious and Flair was awesome on the mic. The big brawl was great too and the making of all the matches was great but Hogan laying out all the heels, not so great.
Doug Williams promo was okay and then the X-Division Tag was okay but way too short. I don’t understand Ink Inc. getting a shot at the belts already while 3D, Beer Money, and the Guns aren’t doing anything really. They crammed too much into that segment as well. Samoa Joe’s beat down was cool though.
Flair hyping up the troops in the back was really good but they need a name.
Anderson’s promo was funny but not his best work and Jeff was funny as well. For those that don’t know TNA had no idea who serious The Pope’s injury was when last week’s show was taped. He suffered a separated shoulder and I believe torn ligaments in that shoulder that required surgery so he will be out for sometime. I would expect him back sometime in the summer though.
The Knockouts Match was okay but again way too short. Sarita and Taylor should be getting so much more time then they’ve been getting. Tara pretty much all but assured she would be leaving TNA soon as she is putting her career on the line at Sacrifice. For those that don’t know Tara recently put a blog up on her Myspace claiming that TNA wouldn’t pay her more so she would be leaving TNA when her contract is up this month.
The Tag Team 3-Way was going good when it was abruptly stopped. All I really have to say about Eric Young’s turn is, again? Really? How many times as this guy turned back and forth from heel to face over the past year and half? So I guess he just forgave the a** kicking Nash gave him at Lockdown. The Guns getting some great offense on The Outsiders was great though.
The Orlando Jordan segment was just horrible. That’s all I can say about it. I understand this character is definitely and it’s gotten people talking but that was just bad. Moving on.
Monsters Ball was okay and a fun brawl but yet again TOO SHORT (sense a theme here?).
RVD-Wolfe was okay and yet again TOO SHORT! They also took a huge steaming dump on that ranking system by having Wolfe job out to RVD in under 4 minutes in a match that had no build whatsoever. It makes RVD look like a stronger champion but makes Wolfe look like a glorified jobber. Just bad booking in my opinion.
The final segment was just bizarre. Absolutely nothing of importance was said and Sting explained NOTHING. He even came off looking like a baby face to start off with all the stuff he said about TNA. Horrible way to end the show.
Before I start ranting I want to talk about the new timeslot. First off, I was against the Monday change to begin with (thought it was way too soon) but I think this is really just going to look like this whole thing was a huge fail. TNA was getting consistent 1.0’s in the ratings when they were live (which was the biggest thing for me because EVERY show that was taped went to 0.6 or under). If TNA just goes back to Thursday with taped shows the ratings won’t be any better than they ever were on that night. With that said TNA needs to be on Thursday nights building their audience more before they even attempt to compete with the ‘E’. I’m sure the internet is already going nuts with the ‘haters’ running their mouths about how Vince kicked TNA’s a**, and TNA sucks and are proving it, etc. you know the deal. But Thursday night is the better night for them at this point. I do think, however, they should do special live shows on Monday’s every so often during the year.
Now it’s time for my rant. My rant is on that big pile of dog sh*t Bubba the Love Sponge. For those that don’t know I will run down what happened quickly. Awesome Kong had an interview set up on another piece of crap radio show called the Cowhead Show. Bubba is obviously friends with the people on that show so he was in studio as Kong started her interview and then he chimed in and pretty much ambushed Kong. Hurling insults and racial slurs (like calling her a “big black b*tch” and “big black c*nt” and saying things like he wouldn’t meet her ‘in the hood because of her you know’s there”) at Kong she finally hung on him (after actually challenging him to come to her house even giving out her address live on the air). TNA acted pretty swiftly immediately publicly firing Bubba on their website. My biggest problem on all of this is the way that Bubba has acted AFTER this has all went down. He has thrown insults on his twitter (and his radio show today) at both TNA and Dixie Carter as well as the TNA fans (calling them “trailer park rednecks”, “c*nts”, and “f*gs” among other things) while claiming he never said anything racially insensitive at Kong. Bubba is a piece of crap Shock Jock DJ that was in TNA for no other reason then he’s Hogan’s groupie and he had no business ever being near that company. Finally TNA fired him and kudos to Dixie Carter for finally doing it. Bubba, you are a pile of trash and hopefully I never ever have to talk about you, your pile of Elephant dung radio show, or anybody around you ever again. THANK YOU TNA!
A reminder, next week TNA will be back on Thursday, NOT Monday.
– Promo/Segment of the Night: Opening segment
– Match of the Night: AJ vs. Abyss/Wolfe vs. RVD (**)
– Overall Grade: D +
Scheduled for Next Week:
– TNA World Title: RVD (c) vs. TBA
Sacrifice Lineup:
– TNA World Title: RVD (c ) vs. AJ Styles
– Sting vs. Jeff Jarrett
– Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy
– TNA Tag Titles: Matt Morgan & TBA (c ) vs. Ink Inc.
– TNA X-Division Title: Kazarian (c ) vs. Douglas Williams
– Desmond Wolfe vs. Abyss (if Wolfe loses, Abyss gets Chelsea; if Abyss loses, Wolfe gets the ring)